Can We Replace Pelosi with Google?

I have seen the most ignorant, vacuous woman ever conceived get elected to the Speaker of the House and contrastingly seen a no-name, tiny little company use hard numbers and common sense approaches to become a juggernaut in the Online world.

Sadly, the former has the ability to help train-wreck our economy and help destroy good, hard working people by passing bills that will steal from those very people and give to ignorant, un-researched projects and back door deals that this Empty Suit thinks are a good idea. Not to mention her obvious disdain for the military and any one who opposes her RADICAL point of view. All I can hope for is that her fellow congressmen and women force her to step down, though I have my doubts that they will actually do so. I mean why would they, Liberal Democrats live the ultimate double standard – they dismiss accountability as nothing more than a nuisance and feel they are always entitled to their positions and power.

Well…here’s hoping Princess Pelosi is held accountable and my faith in government, while not even close to being restored, would in fact be repaired a bit. I could feel as though I have not lost my mind and there is some common sense left in our government. Not much, but some.

And, getting back to google’s accomplishment, get this:
Concerned a brain drain could hurt its long-term ability to compete, Google Inc. is tackling the problem with its typical tool: an algorithm. Brilliant! I say that we make this a two-fold process…follow my logic for a moment. First we demand the resignation of the Power Hungry Traitors Pelosi and Reid – Because its my plan and those are my terms. Next, we apply the google “I quit” algorithm to all Federal Political Representatives who are voted into office. Then, after we get the results anyone who is projected to stay in office more than three terms before moving on or going back to the private sector must be subjected to INTENSE Criminal Investigations in which all associations, tax information, international dealings and any undeclared earnings are dug up and if proven guilty on any counts are given the full sentence allowed by law for normal, everyday citizens – in addition to this they will be beaten with tire iron on live television and all profits from said event will go to paying back the money stolen from Social Security. Punishment for stealing from the proceeds of this event will be death – also televised, same deal.

Look people, I’m just expressing my opinion that Term Limits are needed badly. On top of that we need to vet our candidates better and really find out what they stand for – We elected a community organizer with questionable associations and next to NO Valid Experience to president and demonized a Governor with years of varied levels of executive experience all because of the political parties to which they belonged. How is that what’s best for the country?

I say down with Pelosi! Maybe this bastion of intelligence will act in the best interest of our country and step down…but I personally doubt it. Nothing about her has ever led me to believe her intentions are to serve the people or her ambitions are motivated by a need to serve others. Whatever the outcome, thank you to the normally useless media for actually going after one of your own (and by that I mean corrupt Liberals) and digging up some facts against this nitwit!

I’m Thinking….McDonald’s (My 3yr old Nephew’s Opinion on all of this)
Later,
TAXI

Sneaky Democrats…

Those crafty bastards are at it again up on the Hill. Today, despite the presidents opposition (supposed opposition) to the “Fairness Doctrine”, the Senate is currently – as in at this very moment – discussing two versions of that very thing. This blatant attack on free speech and free enterprise is obscene and targets such a specific group that the motive is painfully obvious: SILENCE THE OPPOSITION FOREVER! Don’t believe it? Really? Is it so hard to believe that with all the corruption in government that there are people who would do whatever it takes to keep their power and influence, which is made easier with a media biased to their cause. If the media presence were suddenly completely unopposed then who would know the truth anymore? Who would keep the balance in check?

Its all a little too convenient that the most corrupt, least deft politicians in Washington throw the most support at this bill. Speaker Pelosi, the first Legally Retarded Speaker of the House, has backed the Censorship Doctrine. She has also received the lowest rating of any Speaker in modern history as well as being a part of a Congress that has dipped down to single digit approval ratings at several points since the democrats have taken back power. The Democrats took advantage of Republicans lack of Integrity and failed promises. Certainly not all Republicans failed their constituents, but enough for them to lose their seats and their hold on the power struggle in the House and Senate. The Democrats across the board won elections in conservative districts and states espousing values that they immediately contradicted upon being elected back in 2006. They lied…politicians lying to get elected? Nooo…never! It happens in both camps but the Democrats are taking a dangerous step towards a style of governing that leads Socialism, Communism, Despotism..you name it that’s the type of measures they are taking. They deny it of course, but our democrat leadership seems to be unaware of world history especially where it pertains to government. Last I checked all this was covered before I even left grade school. I know our education system is failing our youth but its not so bad that basic history isn’t being taught, but it is obviously being ignored. As is the duty of our representatives to actually fully read and understand legislation they are passing.

Clearly politicians who don’t bother to read the largest bill in the history of our government, increasing the size of government drastically and racking up multiple generations of debt before we break even or worse yet, that we never recover from – those are the President’s words by the way – will not have a problem passing a censorship bill that targets private citizens who have flourished in talk radio. The obvious big names are Sean Hannity and Rush Limbaugh among others, and they have broken no laws and offered their honest opinions to audiences that obviously have responded well and chosen to listen to what talk radio has to offer. Ask this question of yourself: When Republicans were in power, despite the mistakes they did make, did they ever seek to silence free speech? I’m sure a few of you hardcore Leftists are going to mention the former President’s ban on Press photographing home bound caskets with our slain soldiers as a limitation on free speech. I have only this to say to you, “GO FUCK YOURSELVES!” I know its crude and unrefined and uncivilized and I don’t care. I know the sacrifice of our armed forces without allowing protesters and paparazzi hacks calling themselves Photojournalists abusing and tormenting the families and loved ones of those brave men and women.

It is the job of the press to inform on the news in an unbiased, professional manner. Those days are gone. Our youth believes the Daily Show is real news. WRONG…entertaining at times, yes, but not unbiased reporting. Neither are many of the shows on talk radio. These shows are reporting news, yes, but they are also paid for their opinions. Political pundits are the opinion based media…and they are allowed to be biased and entertaining. Its funny that no one on the right has suggested that we shut down Hollywood or demand equal movies be released with conservative messages else we pass legislation to force studios to do so. The Un-Fairness Doctrine is an attack on the free market. So while President Omygoodness says he’s against it I have no doubt he will sign it into law if a measure is passed. His actions betray his words and the words of all his minions on Capital Hill.

Here’s a perfect example of how the Media is dropping the ball and not properly researching claims and vetting people out when they personally support the Politician: Joe Biden went on the “Today” on one of those network channels I don’t watch (I read about this stuff on the web so don’t give me any crap about “You didn’t even see it”) and said “Louisiana is losing 400 jobs a day, so what is Jindal doing?”   Point of fact, Louisiana added almsot 4,000 jobs last month. During these dire economic times a conservative Governor with a clear message and uncompromising values is growing our (I am from Louisiana) state economy and the Today show anchor just agrees, assuming Biden – the Human Gaff Machine – knew what he was talking about.  Before Obama selected him as his VP the mainstream trashed Biden for being a idiot cause they wanted Hillary or Barry in the White House, now he’s suddenly a genius.  He’s a narcicist to be sure, but a genius he never was nor will he be.  Even if you thought Bobby Jindal’s delivery was a little hokey, it is the voters’ responsibility to remember we need content over appearance in our elected officials. We are largely in the predicament we are in because voters keep letting the media tell them what to do and how to think. When we, the people, choose to think for ourselves we end up with strong leadership and economic prosperity. When we stand in line and wait to be told what to do we see economic ruin and corruption.

I’m sure I am a little hard to follow of late, largely because the scope of what is covered of late is so broad. Our new President is trying to ram so much down our throats so fast that by the time we realize it won’t work or it was never intended to it will be too late. Its a bold move and a massive power grab but I personally think it will end up biting him in the butt come 2012 unless he can give out enough handouts to appease voters and silence talk radio shooting down almost all opposition thought reporting on the events in Washington, D.C. Its so disappointing to hear people so adamant about backing Obama and whatever he wants to do without thinking about the consequences. It must be nice to never need to be accountable for anything, but that’s not the way I live, and not counting the thousands and thousands of fraudulent votes from ACORN and like militant liberal organizations, just about half the country agrees with me, and a fair percentage of Reagan Democrats, real patriots that still register as Democrats but don’t want massive tax hikes like we just got force fed. I know, it is a tax break according to Barry Smooth, but where do you think the money will come from once he rapes the people making over 200,000 a year? The numbers have already been crunched…there was a very telling article on Drudge earlier that suggested that based on current trends the President’s Robin Hood plan will fall flat in a couple of years and the middle class he loves so much will be saddled with a massive tax hike all to support those of us that don’t even pay taxes. See, its easy to lose focus as these topics end up blurring into one another.

These people are about as intelligent as a bag full of hammers. I mean Socialists. They won’t accept the mantle but they barely deny it. Obama taught a course using the teachings and writings of Saul Alinsky, a radical Socialist. He admits learning from this man. Why does no one think this is a bad thing? They are clever, though. And they clearly read people well because their campaign of manipulation, class and race warfare was brilliant. I’d get into Hollywood’s contribution to this travesty but I’d be here a while and I’ve already gone on for quite some time. Sadly, Hollywood is much like the Liberal Democrats in power. Good intentions, bad ideas, tons of money, and constant contradictions. When they don’t have an answer they make one up and say it convincingly and the sycophants in the media report it as fact like good little sheep. That’s it, no more on Ass-Holywood. No more at all today. I told you so…its preemptive. We need leadership and ideas that have proven successful and we got a symbol and a bunch of empty suits with good PR people. We Will Recover! I have no doubt we will at some point find our better selves again, but this current experiment will fail as it has every other time it has been tried. Big government never works in free societies…not for long anyway…the temptation of elites or military leaders like Chavez, Castro, Stalin to name a few, to take control for the “Greater Good” proves too great. One more time…I Told You So. I’ll say it again later to be annoying. Don’t worry, I won’t forget.

This isn’t where I parked my car…
TAXI

Its Friday…Its Raining…Do You Know Where Your Goat Is?

My titles nearly never tell of the topics or contents of my rants, articles, musings, etc…its just more fun that way.

FINAL STIMULUS BILL BALLOONS TO 1,071 PAGES...
Dem Senator Predicts: None of His Colleagues 'Will Have Chance' to Read It...
Congressman: 'We all cast our votes with one hand and crossed our fingers with the other'...

These are the three leading headlines on drudge today. This stimulus bill is the death knell of freedom and capitalism in America. The politicians are freely admitting their intentions to hoodwink the citizens they represent via misinformation or simple lack of information available. They freely admit that most of the elected representation in Washington won’t even fully be aware of or understand the contents of the Democrats’ Magical Mystery Bail-Out Bill. I don’t have it in me to continue on singing the funeral dirge of the Red, White & Blue so I’ll just move on to something more befitting a Friday.

Carnival season is upon us once again…welcomed with the cool, dank embrace of mother nature via the typical, New Orleans-style weather. Oft times I’ve thought of Southern Louisiana as a boozed up cesspool, rife with criminals, entitlementalities, addicts and liberals (the last of which may be redundant…just being thorough) the weather always seeming to reflect the general demeanor of the populous. Maybe. I suppose we could very well be the city of the damned, but we throw a wicked-fun party every year (actually more like every few months) despite the haze under which we typically exist. I realize its financially motivated on the whole…tourism+cash money=economic stimulation (notice that nowhere in that equation, despite the use of my favorite Orleanian term “cash money”, did the words more taxes, or government intervention appear). Mardi Gras both highlights the decadent excess and the down home values and tradition in some kind of tack welded Frankenstein’s monster paradox that pretty well sums up our way of life in and around the Crescent City. I never fall short of amazed at how we somehow pull off Carnival every year without major incident. To be fair, there is a bit of crime and occasionally a brutal crime occurs, but its mild compared to what would be expected at such a massive, alcohol-fueled happening. Interesting place to live in more than interesting times.

I feel like I’m banging on a very somber gong, like T-Rex off his anti-depressants. So, in response to my own broodish scribblings I present you with…

PICTURES…of…INTEREST!

This is why I don’t jog anymore

“I’m the king of the frog people, damnit!” Frickin Germans have too much time on their hands.

She got these badass new sunglasses that turn Asians into Cyndi Lauper – apparently there is a market for that.

I’m Seven (count them) Seven Cell Phones Imortant

Asian scooter enthusiast stalked by Rogue Orange Tree with Al Qaeda ties

When you’ve seen a Black Bear racing a Donkey this just isn’t that impressive

Happy Mardi Gras, go out and party and spend some money while you still can, they just wrang up about $800 Billion in debt in Washington a few hours ago and we’ll likely never know where they end up spending it.
As it stands, most of the Congressmen haven’t even had a chance to read the entire proposal…I hand in a half-ass job like that and I get fired. Maybe its about time we start firing some of the inept career politicians. Not yet? don’t worry, once they’ve spent all the money of the working class they’ll come after everyone else as well…then you’ll selectively forget that you ignored all the warning signs and chose to sell freedom and capitalism down the river for a few handouts and the promise of a cleaner, more environmentally conscientious America, free from the faux-threat of man-made global warming. I realize I drifted back to the dark side there for a minute – I must be in one of my “Black Moods!” (from Fierce Creatures) – but these ultra-liberal criminals, and that is what they are, won’t come to their senses until a great big Polar Bear walks right up behind them and bites them on the ass! And then I’ll still have to convince them that it wasn’t George Bush, it was, in fact, a Polar Bear. Man I’m grouchy right now…got to be the stumpulous bill getting passed.

I’m Outty 5000,
TAXI

Stop F#@%&*g Whining!

When did we stop believing in the American Dream? I was concerned, very much so, during the presidential race that we were so desperate for something different we would elect a Socialist for president. My concerns were valid. It was bad enough that Bush was a populist like his father, which means that despite being a staunch defender of our nation’s security he was prone to idiotic ideas such as the first round stimulus package and the McCain/Kennedy Amnesty Bill.

Today I heard a soundbyte on talk radio, the soon to be censored then shut down by the “Fair minded” liberals we put in charge, and it was of the President and one Mrs. Hughes. She said to the president through tears, “I have an urgent need, unemployment and homelessness, a very small vehicle for my family and I to live in…” The president uses this as an example, as the model of how bad things are in our nation. I’m going to go out on a limb and say he might be overstating the case by a few tons to get his Pork-laden, non-stimulating stimulus package passed. Why would increasing government spending, government entitlement programs, and government employment opportunities benefit our nation. The free market has always been the lifeblood of our capitalist society. Government’s role in it should only be in the form of prosecution of criminal activity in that system and loans to small businesses using the interest earnings as a means of paying for “necessary government programs”.  The market corrects itself if allowed, but we have stunted that and it looks as if this will continue because of the stranglehold on power the Democrats have right now.  Republicans didn’t take advantage of their time in power properly…what was done well, has been overshadowed with more of the same old politics.  And on top of the missed opportunities, the Right seems to show class and a sense of I’ll meet you half way when it comes to the left – who do not return the courtesy.  What the Republicans are doing now is what they needed to do all along, do what is in the best interest of the people they represent and not meet the opposition half way.  What is the point of having core values and a system of beliefs if you constantly compromise them?  We need strong leaders whose goal is not a career in the limelight, but rather a few terms of hard-line, take no prisoners public service and then a return to the private sector or retirement.  Who can trust people who desire a lifetime in politics, save a few elder statesmen/women who get in late and politics becomes the remainder of their active, working life?

I’ve drifted a little off topic…we were supposed to be talking about the whining of the people.  This woman, Mrs. Henrietta Hughes, the face of the financial crisis.  She wants the president to provide a home with a kitchen, a place for her family to live.  Guess what, homes cost money.  And were it not for the party of the man she and so many others voted into office, the irresponsible lending practices and the following bailout plans, and government takeovers of entities in the private sector, she would be far less likely to be in the position she is in today.  We gave up on good, old fashioned pull yourself up by the bootstraps and work your way back to prosperity and traded it in for “give me what I need Messiah, I can’t do for myself”.  Notice that republican leadership didn’t send out agents to dig into the past of Mrs. Hughes as the Obama Administration did to Joe the Plumber during Barry’s run for office.  I’m sure the one or two liberal readers that stumble upon this blog will see this as my uncaring attitude toward my fellow man….but like anything in life (such as this piece of filth we are calling a stimulus package) you have to read the fine print.  I do care about those who CANNOT HELP THEMSELVES…severe disabilities and disorders…that’s who I volunteer my tax dollars to – not funding abortions overseas, not seeding funds to ACORN, a company under investigation for voter fraud all over our nation and likely largely responsible for getting our President elected.  How is that not a conflict of interest?  Lets fund a shady organization tied to getting people elected through nefarious means with our tax dollars.  Crying to the president to save you from all your troubles…is that who we are?  The president has little to do with the process anyway.  Elect Senators and Congressmen to represent your beliefs in Washington, the president is mostly a figurehead, a face and voice for our nation and for what we stand.  To be perfectly honest I feel like its more dangerous for our leader to be much more than that.  An ambitious leader who ascribes to the views of such Socialist gems as Saul Alinsky and William Ayers troubles me far more than a Populist Cowboy with the nation’s best interests at heart.  Socialists have a strange way of winning people over despite all logic and then becoming Despots.  I don’t know that we are headed in that direction but this is historically how it starts, which is why I am so concerned.  Read up on Stalin…and no, I’m not saying he will murder millions…read between my lines.  I am simply stating a historical correlation.

When? When will it be too much? What catastrophe do we require for the uneducated masses to stand up and say, “Hey, you are stealing our freedom!  This is not for our own good but for your own selfish endeavors in the guise of the Greater Good!”  A balance of power is seen as an excellent system of checks and balances…I quite agree.  Dissenting views are a great way to keep the majority or popular theories in check from gaining too much power without scrutiny.  Why then do so many Democrats seek to re-introduce the Un-Fairness doctrine.   It’s sole purpose is to shut down one of the most popular news sources on the planet – Talk radio.  Again I drift a little off topic but it does all tie together in the end.

My point is that we all need to stop whining to each other and looking for scraps off the table of Obama the great and take matters into our own hands.  All this money he intends to throw to the poor, downtrodden masses comes from our own pockets.  At some point this Robin Hood mentality hits a roadblock wherein without a wealthy class, outside of the elite political class anyway, our hero has to rob the poor to give to the complacent because they know how to milk the system after years of free handouts.  Pick up a book on basic economics.  You can find resources online for free.  Its this easy, go to your computer (or a local library) and start at google, though there are many more resources available.  There are a plethora of free resources (college level texts to beginner level)  It starts with education, people!  Find out how things work then start bitching about them appropriately.  No more whining!  And if you can’t afford a book, or a computer or have a residence to get a library card then take small steps and start by finding work anywhere you can – no one ever said life would be easy or instantly gratifying.  I can except educated people with differing opinions about how to fix them, but people with no concept of how a free market economy works leading us towards socialism (WHICH HAS NEVER IN THE HISTORY OF THE WORLD BEEN A SUCCESS) is unacceptable.  I’d like to throw one more jab at the democrats for ruining our public school system and continuing to blame it on Republican leadership.  Perhaps they are finally reaping what they have sown in that they seem to be painfully unaware of the fact that Democrats have had a stranglehold on educational policy for the past four to five decades.  Thanks a heap Teddy Kennedy.  Again, Stop Whining!  Stand on your own and find out what being free is all about.  Sometimes its hard but that’s the point.  Survive it, revel in your success and know what it means to live in the greatest free nation this world has ever known. And if that doesn’t do it for you then Baseball season starts in about two months so hang in there folks.

I Remain, Irritated but not ready to give up on the American People,
TAXI

Little Asshole Interrupts Class…Police Intervene to Bring the Flatulist to Justice

Here’s an article from The Smoking Gun, via The Drudge Report:
Florida Boy Arrested For Gas Attack:
12-year-old charged after deliberately “breaking wind” in class

I honestly had no response to this when I saw it outside of “Well….huh?” That was all I could get out for this ridiculous story. A child was interrupting class…WHAT A FUCKING SHOCK! Damn near every child wants to interrupt class a t some point and cut up rather than learn new stuff all day. This is a central theme throughout most normal kids’ development. I wasn’t angry upon first reading this…cause it is pretty hilarious; but, despite the comedic value I found my self reminiscing about the good old days when a kid would be suspended or expelled for such behavior, NOT ARRESTED. I know its just juvenile detention and it won’t really hinder his future success – not that I expect much from the little flatulist. I don’t think that is an actual word or title, but Its what I’m going with so deal with it! I don’t think kids should be beaten – let me put that out there for clarification – but I do think disciplinary measures should be at the disposal of educators and authority figures. You can’t handcuff these teachers and expect them to just take it. Eventually, or at present, you will find they simply stop teaching and just let these kids coast on through the system, or take other extreme measures to deal with trouble makers, such as police intervention. Its funny – and yes, here’s my Right leaning political jab for the day – that the party of “It takes a Village to raise a Child” has brought us to the point where police intervention is necessary to deal with a kid farting in class. Here is the link to the article, the police report is just wonderful…give it a look.

No Farting In Class

Later,
TAXI

What do McKenzie Phillips and Dr. Rockso have in Common?

We do cuh-cuh-cuh-Cocaine! What would Schneider think, Carol?
Why does this happen to the mediocre talents so often – its not as though she pulled a John Belushi, leaving behind a legacy of masterful, original, oft-imitated but seldom doing him justice comedic performances. She was a mediocre talent at best and so why not cram as much crap into her nose and veins as possible so she feels better about herself for a minute, or feel like she has to numb herself because life is so hard…had she stayed off the nose candy she’d never have been fired from One Day At A Time…twice. Idiot.

Later,
TAXI

Remember When News Sites had Actual News?

I have heard Sean Hannity repeating “This will be remembered as the year that journalism died” on his radio and television shows recently (leading me to ponder whether a new book is on the way, but that is neither here nor there). I suppose he has a point. Over the last few years, even reliable, hard hitting, fact based reporting entities such as Drudge, and Breitbart, and others have gradually been getting more and more of the sensational news stories over the actual issues of importance. I know, it has everything to do with our society as a whole – these are not only news sources but businesses that profit through ad revenue, so I don’t fault them for following trends to success – but still, it is disheartening. Let’s face it, even the election coverage is more sensational than pertinent issue based.

Let’s point out a few of the day’s top news stories. I will of course give you my very biased, personal opinions on everything…its my blog, deal with it.

Exhibit A: Pam Anderson tells Sarah Palin to suck it!

Look, everyone is entitled to their opinion, but when did being a whore with Hep C and severely bad judgement as it pertains to boyfriends and husbands qualify you as an expert on politics. Hollywood equals Socialist Lunatics. There is some kind of disconnect that happens to people in that industry where they feel guilty for working hard and making money for their efforts and want everyone to be able to be just as carefree and frivolous as they. They can no longer separate from the pretend part of their profession and feel the attention is synonymous with importance; IT IS NOT! I know this may shock you celebrities out there, but you are NOT IMPORTANT…watch, I’ll prove it and segue into…

Exhibit B: LINDSAY LOHAN'S GAL PAL SAYS THEY'LL GET MARRIED THIS YEAR

First let me say WHO CARES!!! I propose that we speed things up to the GUARANTEED split up of these two lovebirds within the next year or so when Ms. Lohan realizes that she was never a Lesbian, just a coked up strumpet with a dysfunctional family, and suggest they off themselves in some Lover’s Pact or something…it’ll be a fun PR stunt, for me anyway. I’ll bet you my entire life’s savings converted into monopoly money that within a month after the story is no longer front page news another desperate girl with big, shiny, fake knockers will bounce up into her destined role of misguided hollywood starlet turned total whore. Its only interesting in the way a train wreck is interesting…seeing something destroyed has a macabre beauty to it, that’s why we love fireworks and demolition derby’s and seeing guys getting kicked in the junk. This should be left to the Tabloids and non-news entertainment shows.

I am not saying there isn’t a market for this garbage, I’m simply making the connection between the problem we have as a society of separating entertainment and government. Kids are being raised by the TV and internet, guided by Left wing radicals typically, to love socialist ideals and to fight the system by obeying their Ultra-Cool heroes who themselves don’t have inkling of a clue of what is really going on in the world. They prey on kids and teenagers at the stages of life where acceptance is everything to them and turn them over to their viewpoint. So…not only do we have a convolution of the actual “News” about our world, but we have a strong Left Leaning message being pushed through the most popular forms of media by completely unqualified people. When you can’t step back and be objective despite your own personal feelings on a matter you are NOT qualified to report the news, the REAL NEWS anyway. Paid commentators are one thing, they are paid to give an Opinion based on available facts…too often though, news anchors are stuffing their opinions in our faces – THAT IS NOT THEIR JOB. The Olberman and Matthews and Rather types abuse their positions to further their own agendas, which as best I can surmise is nothing short of socialism.

Socialism doesn’t work…it sounds nice, but pick up a history book, even one written by a liberal professor and you’ll be hard pressed to find a successful Socialist or Marxist style of government. Moreover, they almost always end in some form Communism or Totalitarianism. (Too many -isms) They always begin with a movement about “Change” and “Hope” mixed up with nothing but platitudes and vagaries about anything important, and always from some well spoken puppet whose real agenda doesn’t surface until its too late. I digress…but it all ties in with the Media’s growing disregard for the facts so an elite group of celebrities and media moguls and their Democrat friends on the hill can tell everyone how they should live.

I’m getting too far off point so I’ll just tie it off here and say it would be nice to see actual news again one day…some sites and sources provide a fair amount but its all so ridiculous and sensationalized it really clouds any real hope they will return to reliable news agencies. There is one bastion of hope – education…if we know how to think for ourselves we can form our own opinions – now if we can weed out the teachers that are trying to indoctrinate our kids when they are too young to know any better. So much for tying it off, eh? Okay, really done now.

Seriously…

Here’s the latest bullshit you NEED to buy to make your horrible life meaningful again.

#1 – The Laser Comb

Nearly half of all adults suffer from hair loss
If you’re one of them, you probably understand how hair loss impacts your life in many ways. Perhaps you feel diminishing attractiveness and dwindling confidence. To date, there have been few options for treating hair loss, primarily prescription drugs or effective but expensive surgeries. Fortunately, there is a new solution: the HairMax LaserComb by Lexington International, LLC. The HairMax LaserComb has revolutionized the massive hair care industry, and has now made hair loss a choice rather than an unavoidable reality.

I am feigning a cough/sneeze to mask me saying BULLSHIT! I believe that it in reality sucks one’s brains out while combing what’s left of one’s hair. I am using a word generator to rename this invention to the…Quantumn Light-Revitalizer. I doesn’t always have to be funny. Perhaps you should be less presumptuous.

#2 – The Cars N’ Kids Baby Reminder for Car Seats

Its the age old problem of trying to help the every day BAD PARENT not be such a total piece of shit who would leave their kid in the car. The inventor’s website states: Sadly, Children die every day from hypothermia (heat stroke) after being inadvertently forgotten in the back seat of a car. They left out the part about the parent or guardian being a total bastard who forgot their kid in a life threatening situation to speed things up at the grocery store. Still…if you are a total waste of life then this might be your invention…which I shall rename: Internet-enabled Ignorance Controller.

#3 – The Golf Ball Launcher

I know what you are thinking…there is absolutely NOTHING wrong with this invention. I agree, except for the fact that it is supposedly for all types of people including those with mobility issues. I can only assume those with mobility issues would also have a tough time figuring out a way to use the pump…but they are apparently streamlining the product so maybe the new one will have a CO2 cartridge or something. Either way…still a seriously useless yet seriously awesome idea. I will not rename this rare, shiny peanut in the lame inventions turd. By the way Mr. Golf Ball Launcher…NICE MULLET!

#4 – last but not least…the Cast Skate

Now Its Possible to Walk Short Distances, Pivot In & Out of Vehicles and Use Restrooms Without Using Crutches! Allows Weight Bearing on An Orthopedic Foot Cast according to the Website. This is clearly capitalizing on the idea of the furniture moving sliders…seemingly a good idea, except that instead of mobilizing the temporarily handicapped they have figured out a way to increase your chances of permanent paralysis. Honestly…even people with good balance would likely go sprawling on one of these slippery bastards. Also, younger more agile folks don’t have time for gimmicks like this, they don’t even bother to use the crutches properly half the time. So…this likely caters to the older, Home Shopping, Gadget loving crowd. The exact crowd likely to bust their ass so it matches their broken leg. This is a really, really, REALLY…funny idea. I like this one, it is too much fun. I shall rename it: The Moronic Volt Yodeler.

Well…I had fun.

I’m shocked…

That this didn’t happen sooner. Jesse Jackson, the supposed Reverend who backs people who believe in Partial birth abortion and euthanasia, made a comment about Obama talking down to black people and wanting to cut off his NUTS (he does, he’s a Democrat and they are invested in keeping the every American other than themselves desperate, afraid and on their knees with their hands out) This is doesn’t shock me in the least – Jackson only backed Obama because he thinks he has the most to gain from doing so…and by whispering to the guy he’s talking to he only emphasizes that he really means what he’s saying. Why can’t the first legitimate Black Presidential candidate be someone with integrity, experience and real leadership ability…not an ultra corrupt politician from the Chicago Democrat Machine who has ties to some of the most nefarious criminals and extremists in our country. Grrr…guess thinking for myself and calling shenanigans when I see it makes me a racist. People are so incredibly stupid sometimes it hurts…but not as much as it would hurt if Jesse Jackson gets his wish. Enjoy the video.

Embedded Video

Dutch Man Mistaken for Rectal Thermometer, Suffocates After Brief Struggle…

Well not really. It was an attempt to lure you in hoping to read on about the adventures of some poor Dutch bastard who got in over his head, or his neck in this case.

I have been struggling to come up with something to write about today. I though I could lay into my favorite Sociliast, Would-be Dictators, Hillary and Barry Hussein Obama…but they bore me today. I have to be in the mood to flesh out that Sack of Meat, so today they get a reprieve. But you can still enjoy the many faces of Hillary poster, courtesy of the Matt Drudge.

I thought about commenting on the ignorant rants of Mahmould AquaVelvaJihad…his latest was that Israel was a “stinking corpse” and “on its way to annihilation”…but that just doesn’t stir my creative juices for a discussion topic today. I will say that Israel should just level Iran and be done with it…well, maybe not that simple a solution….but anyway, moving on…

I even thought about discussing the ignorant little bastards at San Diego State who got busted for selling drugs then had the audacity to ask the arresting officers if this incident would jeopardize their plans for a future in a law enforcement career. I weep for the future because ignorant troglodytes like these are traipsing toward a voting booth – backs sore from the governments hand embedded deep inside their rectal cavity controlling their every thought – ready to pull the lever for the Socialist who promises them the Most Government Programs with the least amount of Freedom Possible. But no…I don’t feel like getting any deeper into this topic either.

No children, today I just feel like having a Bob Barker/Drew Carey moment and introducing the world to my favorite new adhesive product. Out of Sunny, Southern California comes the adhesive sensation that’s sweeping the nation. That’s right Boys and Girls, its:

That’s right, you have not read incorrectly. Your eyes have played no trickery, and your ears no reindeer games to speak of…its STICKY ASS GLUE. I was reasonably impressed with Gorilla Glue…the logo and such…but this just floors me. It tickles the cockles of my funny bone. And whilst reading up about their fine adhesive problem solver (as you can to at: StickyAssGlue.com) It gave me a new idea for a T-shirt…don’t know if it will definitely make a good shirt or not, plus the liability/copyright issues I’d have to work out and such, but here it is:

“Sticky Ass Glue, its what the Democrats use to hold their bullshit ideas together” or something like that. That’s about the whole enchilada for today. Technically I think I dribbled on about what I didn’t want to mention far longer than the topic I did actually want to talk about, but that is the joyous experience known as blogging. Getting information out there any damn way I feel like presenting it. The lack of structure is almost as appealing as the total randomness of subject.

On a side note, in keeping with doing whatever the hell I feel like, I want to mention that I apologize for my momentary lapse in judgment regarding pulling the Braves Pitching Staff from my Fantasy Baseball lineup. The Devil Rays lineup was kicking ass all last week and the Braves were hurting so I gave them a week off. It was a bad decision because as soon as I put the Devil Rays Pitching Staff to work for me they start bombing. And the Braves, who I have backed since about 1982-83, roughly, are putting up solid numbers despite injuries to two of the greatest pitchers to ever take the mound. Oh well, I’ll get em back to work for me next week. Speaking of taking the mound…that definitely has sexual overtones to it. I mean not too much with Men’s professional baseball, but if you think about womens softball, suddenly the term “take the mound” becomes a scene from your favorite all girl prison movie. Isn’t Baseball an amazing game.

All that from not having any idea what to write about today. And I literally have to force myself to stop now cause I have work to do…but I feel certain I could drag this on for hours now.

Later

TAXI